Date: 2020-04-20 06:07 pm (UTC)
see_the_stars: by recadreuse (considering)
It was just that Rey felt so conflicted.

A part of her wanted to give in to the relief she felt in simply seeing Ben Solo standing a bit awkwardly in her apartment, looking at her with that soft light in his eyes, like nothing out of the ordinary had even happened between them.

She held her breath as she watched him reach out … only to pull his hand back and keep it firmly by his side rather than actually risk making contact with her, swallowing hard as she resisted the urge to reach out and take his hand in her much smaller ones, hold on tight. "I know", she replied, her voice thick. "I like it when you play with it."

Rey stared at Ben and blinked slowly, once, twice. Had Ben really come all the way over just to apologize all over again? Or … was this the calm before the storm? The not knowing was the hardest part, the fear that he had changed his mind yet again and this was Ben coming to put an end, officially, to their relationship.

Their … workplace dalliance.

Whatever they actually were.

He wasn't hers.

If so, that was a particularly masochistic way of doing it! Ben had already apologized over the phone, so Rey wasn't sure why it was necessary for him to do it all over again and why would either one of them want to revisit the clusterfuck of that phone call? Why she hadn't just … gone to sleep instead of texting Ben, Rey would never know.

But here they were. And there was no taking back of what they'd said, only moving forward.

"I - I woke you up and blindsided you with kind of a lot, so. I'm sorry for that."
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